Empty nest syndrome often
goes unrecognized. Moving out of a young
adult from their parents' house is seen as a normal and healthy event, but
there is a general feeling of grief and loneliness in parents or guardians
especially when their children leave home to live on their own for the first
time or permanently. This depression in parents arises out of loss of purpose
and one or both the parents fail to adjust the new situation.
Cause – Every
parent would feel emptiness of home (the nest) but some are more susceptible.
Mother being primary care giver may be affected more but father can also be
unprepared to face the emotional changes. Some factors may contribute to the
effects are feeling the change as stress and not enjoyable, lack of confidence
in own child that he/she would be able to do in the new situation
independently, not having other employment as in case of a non-serving or
retired person. Persons being full time parent and find their identity in being
parent, menopause or death of spouse or having an unsatisfactory and unstable
married life.
Symptoms – There could be variety of
feelings as some may feel there remained no purpose in life (loss of purpose)
because they no more require to work for child and their role was over, some
may feel that they are no more required by their child (rejection), there could
be worry and anxiety about how child would stay in the new conditions. Some
parent feel guilt for not giving enough time and attention to their children
when they were at home. Not always but many a time some parent develop physical
symptoms of undefined sicknesses.
How to Cope
with – Adjusting to the new life situation becomes a challenge to
parents. They need to redefine relationships with children, spouse and society.
A new relationship is to be established with children this may need patience
and time. Keeping contact with the children
through phone, mail or net can ease the situation. These days communication is
much easier and frequent as compared to old days when a letter used to take
long time to reach both ways. Some new
engagements are required to fill the free time as reviving hobbies and
interests which were forgotten during discharging the responsibilities,
developing social relation and joining groups and the most important is
reconnecting with spouse. They should develop a new understanding and should
spend a quality time with each other. Grief should be shared with spouse,
friends, relatives or some professional.
People and society should understand the
change in person’s life as the joint families are disappearing and contrary to
popular belief parents are not always happy as their children leave home.
Treatment
– Empty Nest Syndrome in some case cause some troublesome symptoms
which need treatment. Counseling is required to make the patient and spouse
understand the reality. Though there is no specific homoeopathic medicine but
homoeopathy offers a solution in terms that constitutional medicines help
patient to reconcile with the situation.
Case – The lady in this case had
anticipation of living alone since her daughters got engaged and during
preparation of marriage of first daughter she started feeling insecure,
anxious, alone and sad. This feeling is expressed in certain symptom which were
promptly disappeared after homoeopathic medicine and counseling.
Mrs. D. S. 55 yrs. female
married hindu Vegetarian
Diagnosis – Functional disorders after Anticipation and
empty nest.
ECG – Tracing within normal limits. X-ray cervical and
lumber spines show no bony pathology.
She off and on gets sudden palpitations with weak feeling
for last three years. It first occurred during preparation of marriage of first
daughter. Now, after second daughter left for in-laws place it has become more
frequent and occurs at any time but never during sleep. She must lie down when
she feels enervated. Pain in left shoulder, pectoral and left scapular region
extended to neck. The pain was aggravated during day time, after brooding or getting
tensed on some matter. She had numbness with formication in right hand. She was
snoring since last few months. Her speech was hesitant and uncertain. She has
lost confidence in her routine work and feels sad and alone after marriages of
daughters, first was married 3 years back and the second was married four
months back. Husband was a retired bank employee had his own circle and rough
and tough but had no sympathy with her feeling.
She got menopause at the age of 46 years. History of head
pain aggravated from sunlight and exertion of eyes better after taking
spectacles. No specific craving of
any food but rich food caused burning abdomen.
Her mother had hypertension and palpitation problem, father
had diabetes, hypertension and ischemic heart disease (got bye pass done).
Sisters and brothers had migraine and high blood pressure. Maternal uncle had cancer
of lungs or intestine.
The patient was lean, fair complexioned and smooth skin.
Pulse was regular and thin. Her Blood pressure was 100/70 mm hg.
09/02/11 Rx 1. Pulsatilla 1M two doses at 10 minutes interval
2. Nihilinum 30 two pills thrice a day for 7 days.
16/02/11 Old symptom of pain in right thumb and posterior
thigh and knees reappeared on third day. Knees pain were relieved but drawing
pain in right posterior thigh aggravated on squatting. No palpitation occurred
though it was not a regular phenomenon.
Rx
1. Rubrum 1M two doses at 10 minutes interval
2. Nihilinum 30 two pills thrice a day for 7 days.
22/2/11 She had increased pulse and palpitation on 18th
while dinning, relieved after lying down. It occurred once only though used to
occur 2-3 times in one episode. Left hand fingers and thumb cramps after long
time and for longer duration. Knees pain off and on. Her nape pain was less.
Blood pressure was 110/80 mm hg.
Rx
1. Rubrum 1M two doses at 10 minutes interval
2. Nihilinum 30 two pills thrice a day for 10 days.
04/03/11 Lower limb
pains relieved. Shoulder stiffness decreased. No palpitation. Blood pressure – 110/70 mm hg.
Rx
1. Rubrum 1M two doses at 10 minutes interval weekly,
2. Nihilinum 30 two pills thrice a day for 30 days.
07/04/11 Left posterior thigh pulsating and bursting pain
extending down to tendon Achillis. Aggravated in bed at night, walks to get
relief, better by pressure. No other trouble.
Rx 1. Natrum arsenicum 30 two doses at 10 minutes interval,
2. S. L. 30 two pills thrice a day for 7
days.
13/04/11 Lower limb pain relieved. She felt lumbo-sacral
weakness on walking with aching in thighs.
Rx 1. Nihilinum 30 two doses at 10 minutes
interval,
2. S. L. 30 two pills thrice a day for 21
days.
04/05/11 Felt weariness in left lower limb, sometimes aching
left hip on walking.
Rx 1. Natrum arsenicum 30 two doses at 10 minutes interval,
2. P. L. 30 two doses at 10 minutes
interval 8th day,
3. S. L. 30 two pills thrice a day for 14
days.
19/05/11 Sleep restless due to drawing in calves twice in
last two weeks. No other trouble. Blood pressure 110/70 mmhg.
Rx 1. Nihilinum 30 two doses at 10 minutes interval,
2. P. L. 30 two doses at 10 minutes
interval 8th day,
3. S. L. 30 two pills thrice a day for 14 days.
04/06/11 Trouble free except sometime aching in soles or
heels.
Rx 1. Nihilinum 30 two doses at 10 minutes
interval,
2. P. L. 30 two doses at 10 minutes
interval 8th day,
3. S. L. 30 two pills thrice a day for 14
days.
Thereafter the patient was well and stopped taking
medicines.
Dr. M. K. Tyagi
Research Officer, Sewa Mandir.
Email: 1.sewamandir@usa.net, 2.manju_mkt2003@yahoo.co.in
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